I have noticed working
with my fellow cancer warriors, , we need to give love to ourselves more,
and , we need to express our feelings more to heal our emotional body as
well as our physical.
We can do this through Chi-Lel practice.
In medical qigong, a
tumor is concentrated chi that is only going in and not out. If we hold our
feelings in and do not express them, tumors appear. Physically the chi needs
to move in and out, (open -close, release -absorb) to keep the body in
balance. This also is true for the emotions, feelings and thoughts.
According to Louise Hay's book You Can Heal Your Life tumors
are manifestations of hurts and resentments. I can vouch for that in my
experience with a breast tumor the size of an orange. The breast tumor
indicated I needed to nourish and "mother" myself, and what was I
doing for 7 years? I was not standing up for myself. I was giving all
my attention and energy toward nourishing someone else at my expense. I was
not doing what I wanted nor expressing what I felt in the moment. I would
hold it in and let the resentment build up. This got to be such a habit that
I got used to holding things in and no longer was aware I was doing this.
Meanwhile, all the hurt and resentment became my tumor. Finally I went to a
Jungian dream analyst, and faced my fears in my dreams and started to
express myself. That was 2 years before my diagnosis. By then the tumor was
already advanced. However, my emotional healing had begun. So we need to be
honest and look at ourselves and ask, what is it I am holding in and want to
express out loud? We can also express this out loud or silently in our
hearts during LCUPCD , especially in Master Chan's new CD of LCUPCD (
"Heart, I love you"). Remember this is what is unique about
Chi-Lel compared to other forms of qigong. We use
loving mind or loving intention.
Master Chan voices the affirmations with a loving
tone on all his tapes. Your body responds to this love in his voice. So
if you are not feeling much love for yourself at the time, just hearing his continuing
compassion is healing for you. This is re-programming your old way of
thinking. As time goes on, your heart will open more to loving
yourself. Persevere in the Gong. We are learning to "change the
channel" or create a new attitude through daily practice.
There are many
layers to our healing process. The first part we see that gets our immediate
attention is the physical cancer. We change our diet, and some have
surgery, chemo and radiation. But all this is from the outside (although
whenever we do something for ourselves with healing in mind this is a loving
act and so a healing one.) After treatment, the real healing begins.
The deeper healing is
within us on the feeling level. Feelings are not to be confused with
emotions. Emotions are like the choppy waves on the ocean. The feelings are
the calm underneath; the truth. We need to reach the feeling realm to
complete our healing. So, how do we reach this deep place?
The feeling realm is on
a non-verbal level. It cannot be analyzed and talked about in a logical way.
Feeling brings truth that is not intellectual. It
needs to be experienced. I can go to hours of therapy and talk until I am
blue in the face about my life and all its ups and downs and still may not
access feeling truth. Chi-lel practice will bring up those deep feelings
that we cannot name so we can experience them safely and at our own pace. I
cried for 4 months during LCUPCD and Wall Squat practice. I knew I was
releasing old stuff and I did not have to know what it was. That was a
relief!
Master Chan call this process the "healing
chi tears." I felt so much better about myself daily.
So I encourage you to practice diligently
everyday. As far as amount of time, do as much as you can, and increase it
slowly, and make sure you are enjoying your practice. If you get obsessed or
compulsive this will block your chi. So relax, enjoy, and remember happy
times in your life. Dr. Pang says to remember a time when you were younger,
or before you had cancer. Remember the feelings of being healthy and full of
energy. Remember peaceful, happy moments. Re-live them in your memory. Feel
everything about that beautiful moment in detail while you are doing LCUPCD.
Release the illness and absorb your happy memory into Dantien. This will
increase your enjoyment of your practice and increase your healing.
HAO-LA!
Ginny Walden, Senior Instructor
Honolulu, Hawaii
